Why I Left Ministry

Or a story with impossible choices

Names changed to protect all parties.

It was early 2010 and I was a new youth minister at a parish in Los Angeles. It was an affluent parish but it bordered on a poorer town and many of those people came to this parish for worship and services. At one youth event in the parish hall kitchen, one of my youth volunteers came to me with his ex-girlfriend. He (we'll call him Hector) was 18 and his ex (who we will call Zara) was 16. 

“We’re pregnant,” Hector whispered. 

My heart sank.

“I want to keep the baby,” Zara reinforced.

Pro-life Theresa kicked into high gear. 

“If you want to keep the baby,” I said, placing my hands on their shoulders, “there are all kinds of resources available. If you want to keep the baby, I’ll make sure you can.”

I felt so sure that I could save this baby, save this couple. It never dawned on me that I was in over my head and without the resources to back me up.